AC Update
I just caught my first coelacanth!!!! *is happy*

And a killifish. And I picked up a Rare Painting, which I know Desbreko needs. And K.K. Cruisin' is fun to listen to. I think that's everything for now. ^___^

Which Plant Are You?

this quiz was made by Erin


Um....ok?






Which Stupid Stereotype Are You?

this quiz was made by Erin


Goody two shoes. Heh.






What month should you have been born in?

this quiz was made by Erin

You should have been born in August!
You're Brave and fearless, but you're caring and loving. You love to joke and make friends,
but you're too generous. You have great leadership qualities, but you're easily angered and
you get jealous easily too. You're an independent thinker and are most probably talented
in the arts, music and defences. You're sensitive but not petty and romantic.

Um, gee...what a surprise. ^^;;; That's me all over...though I'm still waiting to see the leadership skills here.

Which dog breed are you?

this quiz was made by Erin

Blehh
Sinus attacks have struck major time at my house. I'm reeling. >.< Or aching. Or whatnot.

IRL
Things need to start changing. I am really not happy with my life outside of the house (family life and online not included). Especially my job right now. I always figured that, as long as I was a good, hard, loyal worker, I'd be privvy to the rules that the managers were following, and not be left in the dark.
Nope. Not any more.
They keep changing the rules on us. Or pulling the, "Oh, we did that then, but we don't do that now."
Bull pies.
I guess the last straw is when Ron tried to pull that on me, as well. He called up during my shift the next morning, asked to talk to me, and blabbled on about the phones. Which is weird in itself. Ron doesn't ask for people, nor does he blabble for minutes on end. Short and blunt is his style. I think he was waiting for me to blow up at his ...whatever you want to call it...when he didn't honor my contest prize.
Or maybe he felt sorry.
*shrugs*
I'm sick of being led around and then being made a fool when someone doesn't tell me what's going on. The sooner I can finish my schooling (which is taking forever right now because of my lazy self), the sooner I can get a new job, and pull out of that mess.
Sick of it. Ginny doesn't work like that.

As far as online...
At least I'm starting to see who my real friends are. *bows kindly* Thank you for seeking out the truth instead of making ugly assumptions. Even when you had to kick my butt to get the truth. x_X
Thank you for carring on the fun-loving spirit, even when I wanted to quit. (Animal Crossing rules!) ^_~
I love you to death for it. It's been an eye opening week.
*hugs her online plushies*

And....
You know, I've got nearly everything going for me...so why am I still unhappy?
Maybe I have a chemical screw up in my brain, like my mom.
I dunno...
But I've noticed an overwhelming drop in my self-confidence the past few months. A large amount of indifference filtering in. And so on and so forth. Which is why I think things need to change in my life. I'm ready to find something new to do. A new thread to follow. My fear of leaving the familiar is finally being overweighed by the excitement of the unknown (which is a major thing for me, heh).

People to pray for
Our troops, our enemies, our leaders; Leo and his hopefully-expecting wife; Terrie; Lucy and John; Shaun; Flora; Dessy Lu ^_~; Danita; James and family; yeah, even Ron, why not; those who need the Lord, whether they know it or not (I have no shame in saying that); my family; myself.

Shaun
I'm not worried. I've got a few friends of the other gender persuasion, so I totally understand. :) I'm just glad you have a chance to get out and have fun.
*sulks* I want a chance to get out and have fun, too! Beh, my only free time's late at night right now...what's the fun in that?

All
It's my infamous all day double again, so I might not be on AIM tonight. Even if I was, I'd be pretty tired.

Yuchi! Sometimes acting goofier than you really
are, you know that sometimes, you just have to
go out on faith.


Which Critter are You?
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Announcement
Looking for Animal Crossing players!
If you own the GameCube game "Animal Crossing" and wish to trade online, please join Animal Crossing Central and drop me an email at kehho(at)hotmail(dot)com, letting me know what your member name is. I look forward to trading with you. :)

Short and Sweet
Shannon gave me a praise worthy eval today, and threw in a raise, too. (I haven't had one for nearly two years now; he was so shocked by how long it's been delayed that he gave me one instantly.) Makes me feel somewhat guilty for being upset with him.

And I'm upset with Ron. I won the contest for a free dinner for two and tried to redeem it tonight, but he denied it, claiming the store was too busy to honor any discount. I'm having a talk with Shannon tomorrow.

Mom still wants to meet Shaun, and she's talked Dad into letting him come visit over the summer. She and I talked all during dinner about him again. She agrees that he looks nice, and could be the right one for me.
"So have you two talked about marriage yet?"
oO; "Still want those grandkids, huh?"
"Well, I may get one yet."
No pressure here. -_-;

Not off to a Good Start
I didn't finish my homework, because I broke down at the last minute and played "Wind Waker", even after I told myself I needed to do my homework first. >.> This may be the first time I don't finish my homework and...

Isn't this ironic?

...I just don't seem to be bothered about it.

I wish I could just hide away in my online life. I feel loved and appreciated there. For the most part, anyway. Out here IRL, the Shannon situation has been flip flopping around, and being the overly-emotional creature that I am, I want to run away and find another job where I don't have to put up with him. That's the thing that's been taking up most of my worry lately. I spoke with my old GM in confidentiality, and he suggested that I might be blowing the mess out of proportion. If there's one thing I hate to hear when I'm really upset about something, it's that. Usually--no, MOST OF THE TIME--because it's true. And I'm sick and tired of being like that. -_-;

I had two managers teasing me about being a slacker yesterday, and the GM making his offhand comments. It was as if Shannon had heard I was upset with him, because he was being nice to me one moment, then being a (butthead) again the next. So I felt a little better at work, more motivated...but...

Mom thinks I'm all wound up because my eval is tomorrow. Maybe. But if I start crying in front of Shannon....good heavens, this is gonna suck.

Today I'm going to cut back on joking around with people, especially the managers. I don't care if they think I'm not social; they want me to prove I can do a good job, fine. I'll focus on my job, continue to be the top sales per hour person, and still feel miserable because I don't feel like I'm being appreciated enough. Ego? Ha ha, I laugh at you, ha ha! Hardly. I've seen the same problem with the servers: when I'm not busy, I bust my butt to help them out, and then they take it for the norm. When I am not going that extra mile, they get mad at me. I never thought the managers would be like that too, but...beh.

That whole paragraph is brought to you in part by James, my old GM. (He, Ron, and one of the old servers that used to work at Chili's are going golfing together today. I hope James keeps my confidential stuff just that.) He also said something to the effect of "Well, there's going to be buttheads in life, so just smile and keep doing what you're good at and don't worry about them." Good advice for the passive. My problem is, I don't like sitting around doing nothing when I feel like I've been insulted or unfairly criticized.

And lately, I've been really...I dunno, blantant about stuff. I've been feeling less guilty about getting angry and telling stuff like it is. Telling people to back off. Or shut up. Or whatnot. I've been letting myself be walked all over for most of my life, and I guess I'm just tired of it. The only problem with that is, there are still parts of my passive self I want to keep, like being counted on as a hard worker and reliable and all that stuff--just not at the expense of turning me into some sort of human machine that churns out completed tasks for others.

At least for now (thankfully) my dreams have turned away from guys, but they are now (unthankfully) focusing on me being really late for shifts, and doing stuff on those shifts to get fired by Shannon.

I need some self-confidence. And I need Shannon to back off. Seriously.

AC
Hey, Des, bad news. Tom's closed all day today, so the earliest I can get those codes is tomorrow. Sorry. :(

Last night
Yesterday, during my free lunch, I choked. For a split second. But it was terrifying. Thank the Lord that it dislodged pretty quickly, and I didn't need anyone's help. I had a hard time swallowing for the rest of the day.
Mom's got some sort of fixation with Cici's Pizza right now. *groans and holds gurgling stomach* But I humor her because I love her.
She and I talked about all sorts of stuff last night, including my friend Melissa who's a lot like me and talking to me a lot at work. (Melissa's really sweet--she's going to be a birth mother for a family she knows.) Melissa and I talked for awhile about Shaun, and she kept grinning at me, finishing the whole conversation up with, "You know, more and more people are meeting over the Internet. I have two friends married because of that."
^_^
I pretty much recited the whole conversation for Mom, and at first, she was a tad ..."leery"? But like I posted in my Blog last night, she wants to meet Shaun. *nervous but happy grin* That's cool. *suddenly imagines a tornado made of trains* oO;

...
Well, I need to get ready for work now. And I got to get home early to finish my homework. And...yeah. Meh.

Sorry, no AIM tonight for me. I've got a ton of homework.

Plus, I'm rather emotional charged right now, so it's safer to keep a distance tonight. ^_~

BTW, Shaun, my mom really really wants to meet you now. oO;

You are Homer!


Which 'Tomorrow , When The War Began' Character Are You?
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*looks shifty* Besides that fakeout on the leadership part, that suits me ok.

Sara
Happy Navel Day! (And I'm still Canta, but I haven't taken it again since I told you the first time. ^^)

AC
Let's see...I finished my pteradactyl. I GOT MY BASEMENT! *grins widely* I found that one pelican that washes up so often on the shore again. I found out I missed the sports festival Friday...I was at work, IRL. ;_; I'm taking another shot at a Money Tree, and I hope this one both survives AND produces. Oy.

Rondoism
Really really tiny one. One of the servers (who loves teasing me, and I, her back) was teasing me again. I was saying something and she hollered, "Oh hush UP Ms. Eight dollars and 25 cents an hour!"
Would you believe I took a fake swing at her? It wasn't bad, honest! I made sure to stay far enough away so that I wouldn't touch her--and I didn't. But she was laughing startled.
Ron whooped it up. He'd never seen me ball my fist before, much less take a swing at anyone.

...but after that, I just got really really sullen no thanks to Shannon! I silently did everything Ron needed doing, even when he didn't ask. That kinda amused me when I would pick up on something he needed, slip off to go do it, and come back to see him look puzzled when he found the task mysteriously done.

I know he knows I still care about him like a second dad. I guess he just kept his distance today, because he's pretty good at picking up when someone's sore about something. I'm sure he wanted to keep his butt away from the "I HATE SHANNON!" fire that I was fanning. I don't hate Shannon, I'm just really really sore at him right now.

I just wish Ron'd respond when I said goodbye for the shift. Beh....still miserable. Not really looking forward to work tomorrow...>.<

Can we start today over, or at least fast forward through it?
You know, my post earlier this morning was not a plea to make my life worse. But today was definitely a bad day.

Once again, Shannon and I are at odds. I'm trying my best to be a good and social server to him, but he always looks angry when I look in his direction. Then he started hinting heavily, then outright telling me, that he did not approve of the way I've been doing my job lately. No other manager has ever done that; I've asked them to tell me if they have a problem with my service, and Shannon is the first to ever complain. In any case, Shannon's doing my employee evaluation this Thurs., and it's looking pretty bad for me. Which I don't think is fair--as long as the customers are happy, what's the problem? I thought he was mad that I wasn't social with him (and I've been making sure to say hi and talk to him), and he's STILL mad at me. And nothing in my ability to serve, as far as I can tell, has changed; like I said, my customers are happy with me. I'm even getting compliments again, which hasn't happened in a few months. You'd think if I was a bad worker, they would be complaining, not complimenting.
(Expect me to be in tears Thurs.)
Anyways, this got me so flustered I made my customers nervous and, as a result, I got nervous around Ron. He just about accused me of avoiding him, and I was nearly in tears.
When I finally got a chance to go home, unexpected construction detoured me to anywhere but where I wanted to be. It took more than twice my normal travel time to get home (50 minutes, as opposed to the common 20).
And I guess nobody bothered to let my dog Fred out, because I found he used my room as a bathroom. At least he didn't go on my art...
I'm staying home from school tonight. My graded midterm is coming back this evening, and all I need is to be more upset.

Dissertation
Dang, I completely forgot to do that yesterday; as soon as I get a chance, I will....heh heh heh.

Emotional Rollercoaster
It's been one the past two days. Oy--I'm making a voy to try to take care of problems before they become really big (to me, anyway). Right now, I'm drained of all emotional rationality, and any new incident is liable to see me totally spaz out ten times over the way I started to last night. @_@'
At least I think I'm starting to figure out when to feel jealous and when not to be threatened. Those old feelings are resurfacing again, but I'll be danged if I let them screw it all up again.

OWCNOUTS no more
And so, all is right with the world again. At least, in this area. ^_____^
No more craziness...at least, of the in-understandable kind. (Yes, that's a word, cause I just made it up, so THERE! ^^)